phone icon
Our Blog
time posted
Feb 01, 2018

What to Expect from Marriage Counseling? 5 Ways to Get the Most from Marriage Counselling in Calgary


Marriage counseling is much more than listening to a trained professional tell the patient what to do. It involves choosing to participate in your own healing. That means the roles of you and your spouse must be active rather than passive. By going to marriage counselling with the following resolves in mind, the odds of getting the most from marriage counseling workshops are much higher. In this article, we will reveal the secrets of what do you do in marriage counseling.

Dig Deep

One of the most common reasons for marriage counseling is to look beyond the obvious and dig a little deeper. What sort of feelings is hiding just behind the ones that you readily identify? The key to overcoming whatever is troubling the marriage may lie in those unexplored feelings.

Perhaps you are angry about something that was said or done. What other feelings did those actions trigger? Are you feeling embarrassment, rejection, or helplessness? It may mean digging into areas you would rather avoid, but the effort will pay off.

What to Say in Marriage Counseling? Relieve Your Feelings

It's not unusual for professionals offering marriage counselling in Calgary to encourage the use of "I" statements. Instead of projecting feelings onto your partner, relieve your feelings by stating "I think" or "I feel." The point of marriage counseling is to articulate what is happening inside in a way that makes it clear what is going on inside while avoiding accusations.

Give Each Other the Benefit of the Doubt

One of the main concepts of marriage counseling is "Whatever you think has happened, your spouse may have a different view". Instead of assuming the worst about what your partner thinks or says, try to assume the best. There may be more to the story than what you have seen or experienced up to this point. While this can be hard to do, when attending marriage counseling, step back and try to be as objective as you to make it easier to resolve problems in a way that's acceptable to both of you.

Set Aside Time to Spend Together

Many marriage counseling services recommend that couples intentionally set aside time to be alone. That means doing more than showing up together for marriage counseling retreats. Even when the couple is living apart, committing to meeting for lunch or dinner a couple times each week and just talking is helpful. At the least, it will make communication during marriage counseling easier.

Demand More of Yourself Than Of Your Spouse

In order for marriage counselling in Calgary to work, both parties must be actively committed to the effort. Even so, you are in a better position to determine actually when you need marriage counseling and what you want to happen after. During marriage counseling, focus more on setting personal goals that move you toward that outcome, and spend less time thinking about what your partner should do. Assuming both spouses use this approach, the odds of coming to a consensus of where the relationship should go will be better. This is one of the main approaches of marriage counseling to take advantage of.

So, does marriage counseling work? Can marriage counseling save your marriage?

The goal of marriage counseling is to support the couple as they determine what sort of future they will pursue. In many cases, that future involves staying together and moving past whatever obstacles brought them to a counselling professional. Enter the effort with a commitment to be actively involved and the two of you are more likely to find the path that is best. Marriage counseling is most effective when both partners participate and are willing to work on their relationships.

I am the founder of One Life Counselling and Coaching LTD and I am honored to lead a team of professional psychologists, psychotherapist’s and life coaches who dedicate their professional lives to helping people to elevate their mindsets, evolve their beliefs and learn to thrive in the present moment.
Contact Us
book an appointment
linkedin facebook pinterest youtube rss twitter instagram facebook-blank rss-blank linkedin-blank pinterest youtube twitter instagram